Sunday, December 28, 2008

selekeh

i refuse to write more often in this blog... indeed of hesitation.. sorry to say to my very own self.. i never answer to myself greatly... i mean in no matter sort of situation that i belong to... whatever lah yang aku runsingkan.... hmmmm... i just came back from outing... basically the main purpose is to buy my text book since the distributor for my class refused to send us in bulky anymore... i was being foul mouth by said, "they are so stupid!!".... so i have to find out for mine... the price is pretty high... forget bout the money worried.. but i am currently have a sloppy routine... i think the word habit to be exact... hmmm..... that's sounded so lost-in-a-very-own-good-deed... i gave a glance look to a wall mirror... i tried to figure out some kindness.. i admit to say that 'kind' is a matter for time being... everything in our single life is must be in kindness... for me, that is so cheap... u can't be unsincereness or else u will be the one of most freak human being... i know that i am a very wordy person.. i'm gonna type in a many count of words... or even i will talk in a much of broken words... maybe they never motivate to anyone.. or they may be help some.. for those who is letting waste your time by reading this, u are actually having a high pride in my list... so, congratulation!!.... hmmmm..... i know i have a title of 'selekeh'... sangat selekeh in everything... as what recently included is my habit in managing my life... i know some might say, "mampos lah itu idop ko, pasal apa ko nak gitau kitorang"... woah... wicked... don't mess with me... i know i might reply them, "ko pun mampos sapa suh baca blog aku".... this is no intelligible meaning... aku memang suka buat skrip sendiri... walhal none of manusia is gonna care bout this at all even myself... hmmmm.... actually i just despaired the following sentece for selekeh... biar lah aku nak habiskan kata-kata di sini.. sebab aku berasa sangat malas nak taip lagi... esok lusa lah sambung...
....................macam kambing gurun....................

Monday, December 22, 2008

dwell on

i was delaying this post since i am not a very cool person to let myself to be trapped... indeed... i wasn't so wise in putting the confidence... what the hell trap here?? seems someone had bumped my head then said, "u've been arrested!!".... so police thingy here... this ain't sort of cops at all.. but i slightly felt it ... i was keep thinking should i dwell on every single post that i want to say it out... i'm stuck.. i felt reluctant to write... am i supposed to?? shut up... i cannot be... that is why i still post this new thinking... i should stop complaining the very-lack-of-confidence here... ok now i feel far great than a few seconds ago.. aku memang manusia gelabah... ke kelam kabut?? itu seperti clumsy nyanyian Fergie.. she's clumsy in love... but i am clumsy in writing... semua ini rungutan aku sendiri.. biarkan aku berlamunan dan berfikir sendiri... ok just now i played the guitar since i never touch it in a many days... so poor encik kapok... my finger also started giving me a little hurt once.. everyday i bet myself to stop being lazy... sometimes the promise isn't enough to change myself... i am hard headed... but sometimes i know i have a good passionate about my life... i never give up to ask myself to be more better than before... i could be able to help myself without thinking of kegagalan... benarkah??? aku memang kuat mengelamun.. because my dream is always pure...
..................i am bright..............

Sunday, December 21, 2008

dawn of hope



"...............and i give all the love in the world"

video

If today happened to be my wedding day as the day i made a life-long commitment to my partner, what would i say?? with knowing what i know today, would i change my vows?? thus when my beloved someone asks me how my love is so proven...what would i say?? i could rather to be an excited speaker or just give a silent answer???? the best that might be appearing is so overloaded delight of myself... actually i didn't listen to this song for a years...(maybe)... i used to stick to this song when i was 15 years-old which the time that i just started in love with him.... ok back what i had questioned above... what would i say?? maybe i will give all the love in the world.... same as what The Corrs said in the video above.... how jiwang-karat-kata-kata i am... but people will be that karat sometimes... janganlah ego sebab ego itu tindakan yang macam bagus... hahaha... ok yesterday i didn't go to the RTW.. because i was broken ke?? because i was sick ke??? because the ticket was sold out ke?? because i had grounded ke?? none of these predictive answers... but the only word that i never bluff myself is sebab aku nak berubah dan belajar...ok...ok....ok....ok... beyond of what i had whispered to myself is i feel free with that anyway...
............terima kasih Tuhan.............

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

awful

selamat hari rabu... as what i had mentioned in my bahasabijak.blogspot.com, the day that called wednesday is so awful.... so jealous when certain part of them got the title... but me?? dapat juga... but used to dapat... it was ok then... right now, i'm in the digital library while waiting for my abgngah to pick me up here.. this is awful either... i have to wait up anyone to fetch me utk blk sekolah.. but at least thank God, i've already have my own table for study... last day, i had made up my own table.. wah buat sendiri erkk.. nonsense... actually the table is useless... the stands were not function at all... but as what mom had called me "so creative girl", then i fixed it up... so the table won't collapse anymore... sometimes the table is seems like meja main mahjung... hahaha.. nuts.. yesterday, i felt like demam... not like lah.. the true sickness... i've got fever last nite.. so i ate tomyam for dinner... in granting the demam will gone.. but not completely gone.. i took two tablets of panadol.. hence, i took a nap without study... damn.. but at least i'm feeling very well today...no demam at all.... hmmmm.... now this library is almost close... so i got to go... but abgngah is yet to be here... di mana lokasi beliau?? owh it sudden just came to my mind about my midterm is coming around... leave less than twenty days for it... damn fast... i neither prepare nor willing for it... since my eyes also need a spec unless i have to handle the tears in every seconds... so poor me... rendu hisyam some more.... hahaha.. tak leyh tinggal.. saket menda ah nih....
..................pistol...................

Saturday, December 13, 2008

bebelan terindah

there's leave a week as an eve of new year... see.. i'm turning to dua puluh tiga tahun.... regarding to new year thingy, last day i was talking too much bout it... while standing in front of him, the word that sudden interrupted me is 'pretty'... that was my consuming bliss.... sape tak seronok dipuji... i got no much mood for all internet matters.. seems blogger had blinded me to stick to the rest... i am sick for being friendsterer or even myspacer... maybe they are for kanak-kanak instead.. i had felt it for a many years.. nothing that will suppose to be called so pleasure... sure i'll delete my picture collection soon... being less is better.. sometimes i assume it as a best word as 'perfect'.... mungkin juga aku dah dewasa untuk semua ni.... that's a reason for me to get so active in blogging... seronok kot... last day i had made up a stupid cover again.. aku mmg suka buat cover yg bodo-bodo... i know at least i never try to be like others... i know u've got nerve girl... so ok lah... biar lah.. ko br nak kenal dunia dgn si junkie... hmmmm... here is about an age fear... i am feeling under for time being... much of causes that are letting me begini... how fussy i am.. then i tried to heal them by making many collages... yeah.. i got a great manner in doing this.. hmmm... now my current song that i always keep singing is "drive my soul " by Lights.. i have no idea to love this song... maybe i should turn to a new channel for a seconds.. aku dah terlalu banyak melalut...


.........selamat jalan........

Saturday, December 6, 2008

live in hijau mood

yesterday i went to some random mall... in brought along an intention to get a new hijau converse... but malaysian are most prefer to pay a kasut yg over painted... actually we just don't need to be more beria-ia in everything... takkan sampai kasut pun nak over colorful kan... sick... sebab malaysia takde order a plain all star in a many choices of color...so in short, i didn't get a hijau ones.. i noticed that i'm so into green colour.. everything in my life must be in hijau... woahhh.. apa penyakit aku ni... that was why i tried to get hijau color yesterday... it's ok... maybe i should buy through a paypal... as if i already have my own credit card.. hahaha.. but the furious was certainly being ok since i had found a bunch of books that offered me a cheap prices... i felt thrill at one point... seriously, since i only spent RM2.00 for one story book.. murah gila... hahaha... actually i'm slightly a bookworm sometimes... coz i learn everything through reading.. trust me... someday you will realise that you've been improved by reading... it depends.. if you choose the good source, you might be improved.. or else, you will get zero by your reading habit... hmmmm.... ok... frankly, i hate a very long holiday coz my cikgu will give me an assignment yg banyak... actually i just helped my mom for rendang cooking for hari raya haji... so now is turn to do my assignment.. i have to submit it on 9th-Dec... hated indeed... i need to write my opinion for the subject called 'International Management' in more than 10pages... woahh... what the hell opinion that i'd able to say in those pages.. ridiculous.. but this is a keje skola.. ko kata ko nak belajar gi skola kan ain... baeklah.. aku usaha untuk sedikit kejayaan... i know i never had a dullness in myself for these.. hhmmm... some more, my so beloved calculator is broken.. i know Iva(my niece) is a most cause for the broken.. dia suka campak calculator aku... sedih wooo.. i used it in about 6years... ngaaaaaaa....... ape2 pun i need to buat kje skola saat ini dan beli a new calculator for mine...
..............sgt bersabar.............

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

i ain't weeping

this is a big hye to myself.. i always have a good way in digging up bout myself... i still learn on it.. sometimes i can't focus in one direction when the cube of another fridge come and see me so differently... i adhere to my belief when i never been so be able to handle my life cube... actually i got to wake up early on tomorrow.. i have a lot of things to face to... but all make sense that i never been well alert in every single promise that i hold to... i shouldn't blame to any piece of others.. the something wrong is naturally come from myself.. actually the point here is about my study... i had planned to buy myself a desk so that i need not to wait for my turn to use this PC table for study... nevertheless i need a peace and so quiet situation in every seconds of my daylife... but the noise is always exist... i never blame surround me.... but... ok lah, actually i used to live independently which stayed in hostel and without thinking of kemas rumah or even watching the TV... i mean i will do anything as my own please with only focusing on my own study life... in a very simple word, i can't live at home when myself still consider as a student... sebab... i couldn't bear to handle a consequence of home noiser... owh actually i always said that i never blame anyone.. but the problem is come from me... i got no perfect solution on this... i need a place that can give me some comfy in study... maybe it sounds like how choosy i am... but this is AIN... apa yang aku mampu buat... belajar dalam keadaan begini... hmmm.. sigh... sigh... i ain't weeping... i just writing... ok....
............tolonglah.............