aku okay

i'm currently alone at home... usual thing, parent already back to penang... abngah already in sarawak... thus an unsual thing is now Iva already in phuket... i know how she would forget about maksu here by holidaying and enjoying that vacation... in a very pity word, "aku sgt kesian dok umah sorang2 smpai hari khamis"... i just phoned mom, she started worrying about me... then abglang shall back to shah alam rather than just let me be seen alone here... i don't really hope his accompanying since i know i am fully okay... hmmm...

i just back from classes.. i think i should choose a proper talk in this entry... i got no idea for this choice, but sometimes person will choose anything by refer to very current condition that he or she faces to... my midsem will coming around.. to be exact, it will be on next week on 4th of May... just now as i was in class, cikgu taught us how we supposed not to choose to blame on others as if we keep failing in everything we do... eventually, i really minded her words... so sink or swim, the exam must be done in next week... bertabahlah hendaknya... hmmm...

i was giggling in the class... fareez mmg geng mengutuk... u know when there have a part of students that seems konon-macam-bagus-dan-hebat-dan-chantek-dan-make-up-tebal... owh ok... actually i don't mind about how hard you try your best in putting on make-up stuff or even foundation sampai habis satu botol untuk ke class harian... but u know, you are just a student... don't cross a line of your title of student.. you are still within of that... so please don't ever try that so hard make-up style... maybe i am such mean by saying out all these... but ha ok... aku memang kurang senang dengan semua ni bila manusia begini sangat berlagak dengan aku pasal aku begitu selekeh di class.. tak kesah lah.. aku bukan Regina George dalam movie 'Mean Girl'... hahaha...

yeah mean girl... i love that stupid movie.. maybe because of Lindsay Lohan kot though people are keep giving a harsh comment on her, but i just love her... i had talk to my sis about why teenager wanna be a mean girl... most of American teenager will love to be so cruel or mean on others in purpose to have such a big attention from a very hot guy.. i know how stupid it sounds... but it's truth.. as i am fan of Avril or even Marie Digby, i had read about their history life when they were teenager... both are same.. both had throughout a very nightmare teenager life... Avril admitted that she was included in a victim of mean girl... that was why she prefers to friend with a skateboarders who are finally now being her band members that always give a good backup music for her performance... then Marie Digby was also included... she said, she always took her lunch at a library since most mean girl would tease about herself and refused to friend with her... so sad... i thought they both are quite pretty girls who are best to befriended in a high school... but u know America is a very racist country... they must be cruel in pleasuring their own goods... no wonders on that..

Malaysia is actually a very peace country... we love each other without thinking of "how rich are you?" or "how chantek are you?".... but all are just leave a words... nowadays, maybe certain Malaysian love to be that so 'mean'... please look on university in Malaysia... certain part of 'em are applying that racist style so that they will becoming popular and good university because of only some group of races student are studying there... owh ok very sad to be heard... or maybe in our every daylife, how many person prefer to friend to anyone without being that such 'mean'... as what i storied above, most make-up girl in my schoool are very wanna be like Regina George... tak kesah lah.. aku tahu aku memang selekeh di sekolah.. aku rasa itu sudah cukup cool untuk ke kelas semata-mata....

...........bercakap.........

tak penting

tak pasal aku cm terjumpa gambar lama ni.. so it may be like, "aku sgt rindu kau wahai rambut lama"... owh semua entry agak teruja dengan gambar rajah sahaja.. tak pe, sebab aku sekarang agak sibuk dengan kerjaya sendiri.. yeah sgt lah kerjaya.. baeklah.. saya adalah perempuan tulen.. itu sahaja....

birthday Iva

today is my niece's birthday who is a small kid that often been included in my almost blog's entry.. i have no words for this.. so pictures would explain... apa-apa pun selamat hari lahir Iva Dayana yang disayangi... jengah lah ke flickr untuk lebih lanjut.. hahaha..

http://www.flickr.com/photos/chantekbelaka/

balik

just back from class... none of tiring... but i'm pretending some of it... my current classes are really treat me like a hell life since it's a short semester... i realize it's just a fine matter for my wanting to have a quick grad of study... but i couldn't bear to throughout all these... i only have seven weeks to complete my semester... so-called pressure... but it's good for my current life.. i have to concede 'em without giving any crap reason... bagus juga.. aku mungkin akan disiplin lebih... jadi ini bukan masalah besar dan mungkin tidak mengapa... hmmm.... i am feeling down in my very lately... i ain't dealing any down but u know when we are seeing some good return in front of our own eyes, maybe it might just a sight... don't ever say that you are included in 'perfection'.. but rather say that it might just your life luck... this is a thing that really being collapse in myself... aku malas dah nak kata apa... aku sangat mahu berubah.. itu sahaja... hmmm... now i want to write in a short of entry so that aku tak banyak bazirkan masa aku dan orang-orang lain.. aku nak pergi ke zimbabwe....

............kau dan aku memang ensem............

sedikit

owh ok.. i am feeling very well to have some strong words here.. which is can be compared to the entry before and also shows myself was barely okay... or maybe sounded kau-tak-payah-nak-over-cerita-lah-ain... yeah ok.. aku sedar diri... hmmm... i was in penang in a week... (maybe).. at some minutes, i can't remember anything.. everyday is a windy day... without dreaming, i think i am perfectly being loser... that is so-naked... i know i conclude everything with a less of senses.. i lead every single thing by just-saying-and-stating... biarkan... hmmm... my classes are just started... i was playing truant in my very last week... that was penang matter... and i also started being new... owh maybe that 'new' is always been listed in my-want-to-be... yeah i already got it and as long as it never comes to grief at all... hmmm... sigh.... my post is stopped by simple chatting... hot chatting to be exact... hahhaa... only cik ecah will get the point why the word hot is being used anyway... nothing much today since i got to sleep dengan tabahnya... tahu bukan kelas adalah jam lapan... dan aku masih berangan di depan skrin buat saat ini... tak kesah lah... membebel itu sangat menyenangkan ati aku sendiri...

.........sumpah..........

reckoning a nice me

when the world becomes bigger than we expect to, then it able make sense that we can't handle every piece of life merely... i oppose to have a big expectation so that to let myself know about how terrific of world's big in my entire life... sometimes i realize everything without knowing them further... i thought i was centering my life line... but it was left of center... sigh.. it truly be... i imagine to have a cool backyard as a place to fix some worse in my very worst day... u know when we started dreaming and all of thoughts are seriously become logic... or maybe i am beyond lucky by having trust from everyone... person who is trying so hard to be trusted is really called sadness... i was blinded by those trusts... sometimes we should be included in that 'sadness' in order to set some real life without hoping so hard that we are a trusted person... i used to stand on my real legs in having a very nice life... u know when we have everything, we are actually been lost... that's why i was bred to have my very own effort so that i couldn't cross my life line at all... u know, people are just people... all are being bad manners at a certain part of themselves... that are so cheap... owh ok i know i am trying so hard to calm myself... and i know it is a troublesome made... hmmm... i really dunno who am i when i often think that u know when i was small, dad taught me how to be a very good in maths.... it was very old me... but sometimes it is dead and gone...(maybe influenced by Justin & TI's song).. so here the point why i always feel conscious in everything... hisyam often sick to say, "u are so nervous because of nothing, be cool and stop count your weakness b".... i help myself with my surrounds' concern... i know how they've put myself in a very trusted person with no worry... i know how hard i have to be... ain is just ain... they won't blame me but they are highly trust me... yeah for me, it seriously sounds rocky....

.......ain juga dalam gusar kadangkala........

hari sabtu

i was quite busy because of nothing.. nahh.. actually it was something... i updated the jualsampaihabis look.. tiring.. that's why rendu pada blog ini pula.. yesterday i was in terrible condition... being doubt is often called sloppy.. atau cemerkap... tak tahu.. aku cm ribut pada hari semalam.. hmm... my parent go back to pahang today... they bring along Iva as a reason to accompany them.. ngaaaa.. utk meneman itu semua adalah tipu semata... sometimes parent will love their grandchild more than their own anak... that's truth... hmmm... i'm currently at home being lonesome and peace... or a little hungry... owh ok baek... my new semester is coming around... i started perceive bout my result slip... being worried is also often called sloppy... jadi, aku akan ke Penang utk tenteramkan ati sendiri... takde kaitan pun padahal... hahaha.. tiada bebelan yang banyak sejak kebelakangan ini... harap ada orang yang melancong ke jualan aku... atau beri sedikit pandangan di ruang chat... atau lebih afdal, sila lah membeli-belah... hahaha... klik gambar untuk ke jualsampaihabis...

.........terima kasih daun kari..........

kenapa dengan gambar ini?

why the pic has been grabbed from my collections, then roughly put it here... untuk glamour?? untuk nampak macam bagus?? untuk makan jagung??? untuk begigi jongang kembali??? hahaha... none of above prediction... i am missing my long hair badly... that's it...

.........kenangan.......

satu perenggan

i have no tough point by saying that i want to have a great voice... the dream is not so pure but enough said that "i am dreaming ok, is that sounds wordy or even crappy?".... dreaminess... my niece named Iva is not feeling well... she's fever and currently has a rock voices.. hahha.. i really interested with the husky voices that she really unintended to have that so... yeah.. the cough matter.. anyone could be that great husky without intention when we are getting unwell.. but i envy to people who able to have that very priceless husky... yeah envy pada jalan yang baik... tak salah juga.. nevertheless i still love my very ordinary voices... still within of that thankful bila jadi sempurna sebegini...

.........ini sahaja untuk kali ini............

mesti ranjang

there were so-please to put a word hush within this very two weeks to myself... i enhanced some cracks with perantauan... at a certain part of line, i tend to be like hello-aku-nak-diam-lebih-memuliakan-diri-sendiri... which is can show me how i ain't part of obscenity at all... tak kesah lah... sekurang-kurangnya, aku rendu pada blog yang agak trash ini... finally, i figured out some persons that so-preferred to be a silent reader here... it isn't unpleasant but though u guys never been traced by cik ain, ape-ape pun terima kasih.. hmmm...

i was in perantauan mood in last two weeks before... pernah juga kadangkala aku berasa tidak boleh bernafas tanpa screen pc di depan mata.. atau fred di tangan kiri... but i found myself was sangat boleh bernafas juga... tak kesah lah... on last week, i often deceived my gesture in intending to have a very bullshit feedback... but at the last point of that 'last-week', my feeling had sudden gear to be a very patience person... here the credit for me though it was beyond of myself at all... owh ok... note that ain juga berhati suci kadangkala...

hmmm... i lazed my day at a bookstore (seperti biasa)... as my slight good habit is purchase a book as i afford to... the slight is used coz refer to sometimes-this-habit-is-sesuatu-yang-agak-membazirkan.... got it... hmmmmm... i found a bunch of books but only one of 'em fascinated me once...... the book titled "smart vs pretty" .... aku mula sedar kadangkala our current life will influence our choices... at first, i chose that book but i've eventually refuse to.. aku juga mula sedar kadangkala by buying that book won't give me a good act in a 'girl fight' thing at all... so i shifted to another book... dan sekali lagi my good habit was completely happen... owh ok... note that ain juga berhati batu kadangkala...

hmmm... i started being greedy in writing... indeed there were many days i never view my bajusemalam... sometimes i admit that aku suka menulis sesuatu yang agak crap... walhal mak never breed me to be like this hell crap... kadangkala penulisan takde kena mengena pada mak aku.... tapi those good fractions are fully inspired by emak... tak kesah... mak aku memang glamor pun dalam blog ni though she never been told... i only realized when i chose huruf 'r' sebagai huruf bertuah pada hari-hari yang lepas... dan ini view yang sangat ngeri untuk dilihat when i faded out my 'r' feeling with baju 'rock' yang sayangkan aku... rantau dan ranjang...

.............aku perempuan tulen............